I help leaders unleash the talent on their teams and reclaim their power by unlearning silence. I’m the author of the USA Today Bestselling book on Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully (Penguin 2024). My vision is a future in which each individual knows, uses, and chooses where they lend their voice.
Does My Voice Actually Matter?
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Hi Reader, Depending on the week you’ve had, you may be wondering whether your voice really matters at all. Definitions matter, so let’s start there: Your voice is not just the words you say in a meeting (or your vote), your voice is how you move through the world. When you’re 1 in an organization of 1000+, it’s easy to feel small. When you are 1 in 8 billion people on the planet, it’s easy to feel like what we do can’t influence the issues that seem far larger than any one of us. Consider this:
That’s why our understanding of voice matters. If voice is just the words you say in a meeting and you're ignored, then you might conclude your voice doesn't matter. If voice is just our vote and the outcome doesn't follow our vote, cynicism and futility can set in. But if voice is how we move through the world, we reclaim both our agency and our ability to influence the world around us. Voice doesn’t mean you say everything all the time or fight every battle, but that you choose when, where, with whom, and how you show up. As you continue to make choices in the days going forward, here are some questions to consider: 1) What are your personal values?Many companies have stated values, some of which are upheld and others that trigger eye rolls. What are your values? What are the things you live by or live for? The things on which you are unwilling to compromise? Clarity on your own values is the first step to living them out. 2) What norms do you want to co-create?How you show up isn’t just about fitting in or whether you’ll get the next promotion. Norms are what is accepted and rewarded in a context. What do you want to be normal? What will you let become the norm? 3) What will you do?Intent is only as good as actions that drive impact. Will you say “that’s not funny” or “what do you mean by that?” when someone cracks a seemingly innocuous joke? Will you set and maintain boundaries that keep you healthy? What steps will you take to live out your values? If you’re exhausted or hurting, rest may be what you need to do first. In case there was any doubt – yes, your voice matters. How you choose to move through the world matters. What you choose to put your energy toward matters. Because you make a difference in both how you and others experience the world. Elaine When you’re ready, here are three ways I can help…
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How to Use Your Voice
I help leaders unleash the talent on their teams and reclaim their power by unlearning silence. I’m the author of the USA Today Bestselling book on Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully (Penguin 2024). My vision is a future in which each individual knows, uses, and chooses where they lend their voice.
Hi Reader, As humans, we're incredibly attune to how costly speaking up can be. If the cost of sharing our perspectives, insights, expertise, or ourselves is too high, then it makes sense that we wouldn't want to incur those costs. But what if we’re making these choices to speak up or stay silent based on incomplete analysis? I don’t know about you, but I don’t typically sit around and do a slow pro/con evaluation. The calculation of whether to speak up is typically split-second and often...
Hi Reader, Why don’t smart, capable people speak up? One unexpected reason is what psychologists call expert blindness. When you’re really good at something, you can forget – or be blind to – the fact that others can’t always see what you see or do what you do. Research often focuses on how expert blindness makes it difficult for experts to teach their expertise to others. But I want to focus on another gnarly side effect of being an expert – you can easily underestimate the power of your...
Hi Reader, Whose responsibility is it to make a conversation productive? You might argue that it’s their responsibility to speak up. They might argue that it’s your responsibility to make it safe for them to share. After all, if the real or perceived costs of speaking up are too great, silence makes sense. Power dynamics, life experiences, emotion, and perception all shape whether we dance around issues or really talk about what’s at stake. Too often, we get stuck in a cycle of pointing...